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The Abyss of Depression

For those who live within the limits of anxiety and depression it can send you into a bottomless pit and when it’s done with you, you beg for death. The walls are built with confusion, anger, resentment, discontented and discouragement. The abyss of depression can feel like nothing, but everything all at once. Your emotions become you in an instance and life can feel to hard to deal with. Your brain is on sensory overload and the pain, the sting of death is knocking at your door. All you have to do, is open it.

Death feels like the answer

Depression can make you feel worthless, numb and exhausted. Each day you wake up to the same story that plays over and over in your mind. Life will never get any better. You’ll never write that book. You’ll never travel to that place you’ve dreamed of. Happiness is just not in your cards. Lady luck, is just not your color. Thoughts of hopelessness send you into a one way thinking pattern. It’s to hard God, I can’t do this anymore. I want outThis isn’t what I signed up for when I gave my heart to you. What happened? Why have you let the sky cave in on me all of a sudden? Why are my prayers being hindered? Why have you left me here to live this way? Silence. The most devastating sound a Christian with anxiety can hear.

Death knocks at the door. “You know there’s a way to get out of this.” You ears perk although your soul shivers because you know that’s not the voice you should be listening to. But, you give way to it. You hear him out. “All can be finished and done. No more pain, no more anguish. No more loneliness. No more wondering.” These thoughts roll around in your head until you start to believe them. It’s the only hope you’ve been able to hold onto in years. The promise of no more. You contemplate how and when. Death presents itself with a beautiful picture. Your finally at rest. No more to worry about or care about. No more agonizing over the bills getting paid. No more hating yourself. No more feeling broken or lost. No more confusion about the purpose of your life. It’s done.


It’s not easy stepping from the darkness to the light. Especially when your walking out of bondage. Don’t think for one second that the devil isn’t going to fight you for the legal ground you gave him. So, when the day comes and your ready to make that decision to make Jesus Christ your Lord and Savior, just know you’re in for a fight. Jesus is and will always protect you. He will never leave you, nor forsake you! That’s a promise you can take to the Bank of God and cash in at any given moment and the funds will always be available.

Here’s the deal. Walking out of the abyss of depression or anxiety is going to take time. When I was knee-deep in the middle of my anxiety, when my body and mind were feeling it the most I got some amazing words of wisdom from my pastor! He said “You didn’t get there over night and you’re not getting out of it over night”. It took years to get you where you are. You didn’t wake up and stumble onto your anxiety.

What if I told you circumstances didn’t put you there, your perception did? 99% of everything we do is based on what we believe.  This isn’t to say you’re in control of what happens to you, but rather what happens inside you. It’s been a very long and hard road getting here for me and accepting this truth wasn’t easy. I am about as stubborn as it gets when I’ve got my mind made up on something. So taking accountability for accepting the anxiety when I didn’t have to, was not easy. And neither has walking out of it been.

Somehow, someway, something has happened to you and you’ve ended up here. God does not want you stuck here in this place. He does not want to see you restless, anxious and scared. He doesn’t like seeing His daughter/son upset and so broken. He desires for you to come to Him and trust in Him to be everything He promises He is!

  • Your Provider
  • Your leader
  • Your king
  • Your comfort
  • Your caregiver
  • Your reward
  • Your shepherd
  • Your restorer
  • Your hope
  • Your helper

The list of who God is can go on and on! You fill in the blanks of who God has been to you and who He is to you now! Remember back to the times when everything felt good and was good! When it wasn’t hard for you to breathe. Remember the times God blessed you and brought you out of a barren land, whatever that land was. A bad relationship. A broken home. Finances. Strongholds.

Faith is Believing even when the devil has his foot on your throat! Faith is sometimes tears falling down your face and bruised knees. Faith is sometimes pacing the floors at 3am going to war over your strongholds. Faith doesn’t look any certain way other than belief and love!

silhouette of man touching woman against sunset sky
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Perfect LOVE casts out FEAR

Perfect love! What does perfect love look like to you? For me, perfect love means I will always be able to approach Him. The door is never shut and what I’m feeling is never wrong. It means hard times may come but His protection is everlasting and His hugs never run out. Perfect love is trusting in who you love to be everything they promised you they would be. God promises to walk through the flames with you. He promises to take care of you and comfort you. He promises to hold you up when you have no strength left of your own. He promises to always make a way when it looks like there’s not. Perfectly loving God just simply means, trusting God!

God bless!






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